Identity Theft: Not a Joke

I recently had my credit card declined at a health-food store in Asheville. Imagine my utter embarrassment when I was forced to use my debit card like some kind of low-grade heathen.


I quickly made my way home in a huff and turned my attention to having the good people at Capital One get my life back on track. After several phone calls with various accounting locking and unlocking, I decided it might be useful to document a snippet of not only my conversation with the woman who was assisting me, but the contents of my soul. This is my best attempt to coerce some poor sound recordings of my life with the elevated, divine pursuit of art. As you might hear, the result is somewhat slapdash, but still reveals something.

Thank you Capital One. You complete me, etc.

(Author’s Note: Identity-theft is NOT a joke, JEREMY. I know you’re in Indiana, and if I run into you, you are gonna get a bonk on the noggin, sir.)

One thought on “Song: Capital Feelings

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